A Shiny Harley Has No Soul

Much the same as a newborn who can't yet talk, a brand new bike, out of the box has the potential to do great things, but it MUST be ridden. The shiny bike can tell no stories. Sure, it's got lots of chrome, but three years from now when it's still sitting in the garage, what stories of life on the road have you to tell? A truly admirable bike must LOOK like it's experiences, taken out on the long road to achieve what we all desire in a bike, which is "character".

Take my two bikes for instance. The "old" one is a '91 Heritage. It's name is "Black Bike". It has over 154,000 miles on it's ticker. It's done Sturgis eight times and Milwaukee in '98. Each piece of chrome signifies a birthday or christmas present. Each rubber lizard glued to the gas tank represents another town. I've no room left for anymore lizards, and Black Bike is now the centerpiece of my living room while it's sibling, the new bike, appropriately dubbed the "Fisher-Price Death-mobile" gets in some chops.

The Death-mobile is a '98 FLHTC. A big fat black dresser. Before Sturgis of 2000, I had to decide which bike to take. Riding the new bike felt like "cheating" on the old one. Ultimately, I chose the Deathmobile for it's smooth ride, hard weather-proof saddlebags, cigarette lighter and that incredible 10 disc cd changer stereo set-up that's actually LOUDER than the pipes!

The Death-mobile is pushing 60,000 miles now. It has baby stories to tell, only half as many as Black Bike. Buffalo blocking the road in Yellowstone, wildflowers along the Oregon Coast Redwoods, re-tracing the Lewis and Clark Trail, riding "no handed" while videotaping the Vegas Strip, 120 degree heat in Utah, the Elk at 13,000 feet in Colorado, California's Gold Country and wonder of all wonders, Wall Drug in South Dakota. If it's thirsty, I give it more 91 octane. If it needs a bath, I wait for the next thunderstorm. I have dead insects from most of the western states stuck to my engine and windshield. An undergrad insect-ologist would have a field day classifying the remains splattered about my fairing.

I have lived and experienced more of life than most folks could ever imagine. And the “wind beneath my wings” was made in a little building out there in Milwaukee. The Fisher Price Deathmobile is…. "coming home"…. if only for a short while. It’ll be nice to see you all again, but please understand why we can’t stay long, more adventure awaits! Milwaukee is incredible, but it’s just the turn around point for us. The “real adventure” lies in everything we experience in between. Get out there and see what I mean.

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Copyright © 2007 Splatt. Reproduction permitted with attribution

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